Mystery Beers

On a trip to New York City, Liquor Piglet and I stopped at the Village Pourhouse in Manhattan's East Village (64 3rd Ave at 11th Street) for lunch one afternoon. The Pourhouse is a great place with that old New York atmosphere, with 36 feet of stained glass, an expansive bar lit with the warm glow of gaslights and boasts eight HD TVs to watch your favourite team crush their rivals! The massive oak bar boasts 100 different beers on tap, and it's simply a great place to stop for lunch, watch the big game or just to stop for a pint on a warm spring afternoon.

Upon being seated, I noticed a sign on the wall that simply stated "Mystery Beers $2". Of course this was a siren's call for an adventurous boozehound like me, so I asked what the deal was. The waitress stated that for $2, they will bring you a random "mystery beer" for you to try (wino-style in a paper bag, nonetheless). Knowing this was likely to quickly become a fabulous disaster, Liquor Piglet and I placed our order and waited to see what we would get.

When the waitress returned, we quickly tore open out brown-paper packages to see what hell awaited us. Both were products from the 21st Amendment Brewery in San Francisco (who seem to have a knck for coming up with LSD-induced concoctions, by the way). I received a can of Brew Free or Die! IPA and Liquor Piglet got a can of Come Hell or High Watermelon wheat beer.

The Brew Free or Die! IPA is a concoction made from six different hops varieties, boasts a hefty abv of 7% and is apparently the biggest seller at their San Francisco brewpub. The initial scent off this stuff was a fresh hoppy smell that resembled the green stuff you use to clean the kitchen. Throwing caution to the wind, I tipped it back. My palate was immediately assaulted by a taste that can only be described as "bitter, with a hint of ass". The taste did not improve on a second pull, and as I told Liquor Piglet, "it just coats the mouth and won't let go!"

New to the whole Liquor Pig review system, Liquor Piglet was understandably nervous looking at her can. Come Hell or High Watermelon starts as a standard American wheat beer that is subjected to a secondary fermentation with fresh watermelon (!) and has an abv of 4.9%. The initial scent off this hooch is fruity and not that unpleasant. However, the illusion of a pleasant beverage was quickly shattered by the horrific taste resembling what Liquor Piglet described as "gym socks with a hint of watermelon". Her final word on the subject was "blech!"

All in all, the Village Pourhouse was a great venue with an awesome opportunity to try some random beers, LP-style! Check it out if you are ever in Manhattan.

Final Review:

Live Free or Die! IPA - 3
Come Hell or High Watermelon - 2

Black Chocolate Stout

Last spring when I was in Manhattan, I discovered a great draught beer called Brooklyn Lager. Locally brewed by Brooklyn Brewery, it is available in many bars and pubs around New York and was a very nice example of dark, slightly malty brew. Since then, I have tried the bottled version available here in Ontario, and while not quite as good as the draught, was still quite decent. It was due to this experience with Brooklyn Lager that I snapped up Brooklyn Brewery's newly-available Black Chocolate Stout when it became available at the LCBO.

I must admit that while being a massive fan of draught Guinness, I have found bottled stouts to be rather hit-or-miss. While Guinness has gone to great lengths to capture the essence of their world-famous draught with their very good "pub draught" bottles and cans, other breweries seem to flood the market with very bitter, overly-malted stouts often with excessive alcohol content. Knowing this, I had rather mixed feelings about the Brooklyn Brewery product when I noted the devestating 10% abv. However, based on my prior experience with their lager, I thought it was worth the risk. Further inspection of the packaging noted this beer contains only water, malted barley, hops and yeast, along with this description of the product:

Limited Bottling - Winter 09-10

In the last century, British brewers made strong stouts for the Czar's Court. They were called Imperial Stouts. Our Black Chocolate Stout, brewed once yearly for the winter season achieves a chocolate aroma and flavour through the artful blending of six varieties of black, chocolate and roasted malts.

Back at Brian's, we chilled the beer and sat down for the tasting. Michelle seemed overly excited at the prospect of a "chocolate" beer (typical woman!), however once I reminded her that not one of the so-called "chocolate" beers ever reviewed on this blog tasted like chocolate, her excitement faded somewhat. The first thing we noticed once this thick brew was poured into the glasses was it is black, and when I say black I mean literally the antithesis of a summer afternoon black. The great white shark's "doll's eyes" black. Dante's 7th Circle of Hell black (you get the picture). Coupled with this demonic blackness was the oily look of the liquid in the glass. While I have reviewed serveral beers on here that looked like old engine oil, the properties of this brew even behaved like oil in that it actually left a film on the sides of the glass as it was gently swirled around. Not a good sign at all.

By now, Michelle's former excitement about drinking chocolate beer had completely dissolved as she looked with disgust into her sample, possibly contemplating Nietzsche. We raised our glasses with a hearty 'salut!' and drank. The immediate taste was very strong and nasty malt, which finished bitterly on the palate and gave a slight alcohol burn as it went down. The malty bitterness did not fade, but stayed as strong as the initial taste. Brian remarked "this stuff climbs into your mouth, moves right in and doesn't flush!" As Michelle choked down the remains of her sample, she contemplated, "Who'd drink this? Seriously." As I waxed nostalgic about springtime in New York with this beer's sexy cousin, I really did have to wonder.

Black Chocolate Stout Final Score:
Michelle - 2
Brian - 1
Myself - 3

Drunk in New York City

My apologies for the lack of updates. There have been several reasons for this. First of all, the local LCBO's well of strange brew has kind of run dry, leaving me to have to expand my search for potential review candidates. Remember, we are always open for suggestions! If any Ontario readers come across a good candidate for this blog, email me with the deatails and I will attempt to obtain it for review. As for today's entry, I just returned from a week in New York City, where I discovered an absolute must for any fan of bars, beer or this blog: A New York institution in Manhattan's East Village known as McSorley's Old Ale House.

"Be good or be gone" is the motto at the oldest bar in New York; a throwback to days when your local served beer brewed on premesis and women were barred from entering. In fact, it was only in 1970 when civil rights attorneys Faith Seidenberg and Karen DeCrow won a Supreme Court case against McSorley's to be allowed entry. The oldest continually operating saloon in New York has served everyone from Abe Lincoln to John Lennon in it's 150 years of history.

Stepping inside McSorley's is like taking a trip back in time. From the sawdust strewn floors to the burning coal scuttle, this bar is literally soaked in history. The ancient tables are worn down from years of use and the walls are covered in pictures, historical documents and other memorabilia marking milestones in it's history. It truly is a sight to behold. Once you have taken in the history of the place, step up to the bar and order some ale. Just don't expect to find Budweiser or fancy European imports. McSorleys serves only two kinds of ale: McSorley's Light and McSorley's Dark, and will cost you $4.50 for two mugs of either.

Now, it could be said that a storied watering hole like this could make a good living off fleecing tourists by selling overpriced beer while riding the coattails of its reputation. Fortunately, this is not the case at McSorley's. The ale is not only cheap, it is quite good as well. Having tried both during the two nights I spent there (yes, I liked it that much!), I can say that I personally preferred the dark. However, that is only from a personal standpoint as both were definately drinkable. Keep in mind that McSorley's can get very busy, especially on a weekend. This may result in you being "relocated" to another table to accomodate the ever-growing crowd of patrons. This is nothing to be worried about however. Everyone I met follows the McSorley's motto and tend to be very welcoming. I ended up sitting with many different people during my time there, including a couple fellow Canadians from Montreal! So if you ever find yourself in New York, head over to McSorley's for a couple mugs of ale. You'll be glad you did!